“ . . . I’ll wait for you . . . Sleight of hand and twist of fate . . . I can’t live with or without you . . . .” ~ U2
Where is the place inside me that is the Source of life?
When I pause to notice this space, I sense Mystery, Freedom, Beauty.
Then I see you.
How long have you been here?
Are you part of the Divine who dwells here?
Are you a component of my Freedom?
Or is Freedom not wanting or needing any person?
I know I pray to be Free with or without you.
To love you cool.
I also pray to grasp your hands,
Touch your face,
Kiss your back. . . .
Art ~ Susan Seddon Boulet
My Dear Self, I need some answers.
From ego driven self:
How do I handle this being hot as coals on my head angry? I feel kicked to the curb. I have been used. I have been made promises that were never intended to be kept – misled — probably laughed at. Now my pain is being used against me. It tastes bitter. I invested self-consuming love and trust. Now I am cast aside.
From Truer Self:
Remember. It isn’t like I went in sightless. Is it wrong to choose to love someone? Is it dishonorable to give, even to someone who is giving little back? I knew. I chose to love based on examples of those who suffer for others and give, give, give. So, there are false promises that were believed at the time they were given. Big deal. No denying this person is delightful company. My joy is real. Even if someone else’s joy is not. That is punishment – for them to never feel genuine joy. I was sincere. No one can rob me of that. I built another’s new life for them. Their choice of dishonesty carries its own punishment. For me, no fear. No authentic loss. Maybe disappointment that turns into a lesson learned.
From the Divine Witness:
This has no importance. The True Source of You is present in, with, before and behind it all. Your serene power is forever protected. Deceit gains nothing. It cost you nothing essential. You are not harmed, but helped. You are not weakened, but strengthened. Your love has grown more fruitful. You have not become more imprisoned, but more free. Rest. I protect you from “being taken” – there is no such thing. I give you freedom to love. No hate can poison Me/You. It is all harmless.
Love and unified life win.